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A little reality-check about being an entrepreneur – it’s not the easy path. Don’t believe what most people are shouting at you or showing you on social media. It’s frickin’ tough some days and nobody goes from zero to hero overnight or easily. Having your own business is a hugely rewarding path and yes, it can be the path to all your dreams come true. But it’s about as easy as me saying no to my morning coffee. You’ll need to grow and develop certain characteristics if you are going to make it as an entrepreneur.
Can you do it? You absolutely can! Lots of entrepreneurs give up too soon when the reality of building a business hits them because they think they don’t have what it takes to be successful. What they don’t realise is that NOBODY is naturally gifted with these traits. Nobody just naturally has a mindset for success  Essential #1 A clear vision (your what) Know what you want! Clarity is key and the more you can bring your vision to life in your mind, the faster you will bring it into your reality. You may not see every step of the way but get the details of your desired outcome as much as you can, and get started. Essential #2 A strong driving force (your why) Know why you want what you want. This is the number one thing that will keep you going when it feels tough. It must be something that is personal to you and preferably evoke strong emotions. Make it so compelling that there’s no way you’ll give up until you get it. Essential #3 A mindset for success Learn the mindset and habits of successful people. Think like an entrepreneur and treat your business like a real business (not a hobby). Remember it’s something you learn and improve upon, not something you’re born with. Google success mindset or hit me up for some free resources. Essential #4 A ton of resilience This is the part where you fall down, make mistakes, look silly perhaps and then you get back up and keep going. It’s highly unlikely that any of your downfalls along the way will be that serious or life-threatening, so the quicker you accept that it’s a part of the game, the better. Keep going! Essential #5 A commitment to your dream Be committed to your dream from day 1. If you’re starting a business with an ‘I’ll just build a website and see what happens’ kind of attitude, you won’t do what it takes to get things up and running. Decide and commit. Not everything works out but it’s not likely to work out unless you give it all you’ve got. Successful entrepreneurs have created themselves to be that way. They have worked on themselves, improved their mind, tried and learned, fallen down, picked themselves up again, invested in their personal growth as well as their business. It’s not always easy but it is definitely doable. They did it and they are no different to you. So don’t ever give up because you think you’re not good enough. All you need to do is stay honest with yourself about what you need to develop and most importantly, do something to make it happen. If you’ve got a new project or business that you want to get moving on, join me on the next round of my Accelerator program where I will personally help you to make it happen. Check out the 10-week Accelerator here or contact me for more information.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations
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Your words are more powerful than you know. So how you talk to yourself is more important than you may know. And no-one is more critical or harsher with their words than you are to yourself. Ever heard yourself telling yourself that you’re not good enough, smart enough, young enough, old enough or beautiful enough? Ever hear that voice that is doubtful, fearful or criticising? Can’t do it, aren’t worth it, shouldn’t try it. Sometimes a subtle whisper and sometimes a roaring barrage of filthy, hurtful words, your self-talk can be incredibly damaging if you let it get out of control. If you’re someone who is critical of yourself, unkind to yourself or has ever said something to yourself that you’d slap a stranger across the face if they said it to you, read on. The 1, 2, 3 of switching to positive self-talk. Challenge your negative self-talk with some real evidence When you hear that critical voice speak up in your head, or for some it speaks out loud, it’s time to get back to the facts. Is there any truth at all to it? Ask if it’s actually true. Usually not, but that’s rarely enough to quieten the voice. The trick is to look for evidence to disprove the statement. There is always plenty of evidence but you mostly don’t see it because you’re too busy asking the wrong questions. You ask “why am I not good enough” and get answers for why you’re not good enough. What if you asked, “when are times in my life that I’ve done something I wasn’t sure I could do?” Your brain will get busy coming up with the answers aka. Evidence, for you. You are good enough, smart enough, strong enough, resilient enough and totally worth it. So challenge that voice by collecting the evidence that will put it in its place.  If a friend wouldn’t say it, neither should you Become a friend to yourself and DO NOT utter any words that a good friend wouldn’t say to your face or that you wouldn’t say them. Put your friend filter on your self-talk. It’s that simple. Practice compassion and kindness toward yourself instead of always giving yourself an over-the-top, completely unjustified, hard time. Especially if you are someone who has nasty, harsh self-talk, this is for you. Each time you hear the criticism piping up, ask yourself “would I speak like this to someone I love?” If the answer is no, then cut it out. Ask “would I allow someone else to speak to me like this?” Well, I hope the answer is always no, and cut it out! Apply your friend filter to your self-talk and watch how it transforms your words. Crowd out the negative self-talk It may take a bit of practice to catch your negative thoughts and self-talk but over time it will transform. You can speed up the process by adding in a daily dose of positive talk. Instead of waiting for opportunities to switch out of the negative talk, you can intentionally re-wire your brain to accept and even expect the positive. The easiest way is to practice a set of daily affirmations about yourself, that lift you up and praise your amazingness. Start with wherever you feel comfortable. Usually somewhere between ‘I am ok’ to ‘I’m a freakin rockstar!’ Remind yourself daily of how wonderful and capable you truly are and soon you’ll leave no space for the negativity in your head. The important thing to remember is that we all experience doubts and times when we don’t feel up to it. Your inner voice will have something to say, so best you train it to be kind, compassionate and encouraging instead of tearing you down. Watch your words and watch how you quickly feel better about yourself. If you’re having a hard time getting your thoughts and words under control, reach out to me for a chat about how I can help you quickly take charge. Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations  I have ‘moments’ often where something isn’t going the way that I want it to and I lose my cool. This is especially true when the car in front of me is doing 80 in the 100 zone. Or situations where I start to feel sad or angry or frustrated or helpless. I'm okay with that because practicing resilience and getting better at managing yourself in any given moment doesn’t mean that you become immune to your feelings. And it doesn’t mean that you get to just avoid those feelings, or that you get to avoid the shitty situations that cause those feelings. It simply means that you bounce back quicker. You don’t get a free ticket out, but you get out faster. Like the ‘get out of jail free’ card in Monopoly. You still have to go there, but you don’t have to stay. Great right? Then you can get back to being your usual positive, happy or calm self quicker and get on with your day. The flow-on effect is that you get more done and you feel better more often. Your quality of life goes up dramatically. So here's what you can do if this is you too...There are a lot of ways that you can become more resilient, to manage yourself better in the moment, or to respond differently when things don’t work out the way you’d wanted. But nobody said it was easy. In fact, it’s something that takes practice. It’s a skill that you practice over and over again until you get good at it. Over the years I’ve gotten better at managing my emotions and coming back to myself quicker. But sometimes when I’m having ‘a moment’ I forget what I need to do. I just can’t even remember what I’m supposed to do! I might message my partner, expecting someone else to tell me what to do. His response is usually along the lines of “just take a deep breath, you know this will pass.” Such simple advice and usually works. So why is it that in the moment, with me knowing so much that I know, I can’t remember to take a deep breath and trust in the fact that this feeling will pass?  Well, the simplified answer is because when your brain is in a state of stress, you can’t think straight. You literally are not functioning the same way as when you’re in a relaxed and calm state. This means that what you know now when you’re calm, is not what you know when you’re stressed out and reacting from a place of emotion rather than responding from a place of logic. So if you ever have that experience where you lose your cool and you’d like to ‘get out of it faster’ here’s one of my favourite ways to begin building your bounce back muscle.
I hope this helps and wish you a wonderful and joyful week ahead. xoxo Melissa PS Need more help to feel better in your life? Don’t forget you can book a free strategy session with me anytime. Let’s have a chat and see if I can help you get back on track.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations Are you running on empty and taking care of everyone and everything except yourself? I see it all around me and I’ve been guilty of it plenty of times. You know you should take better care of yourself but you’re too busy, too tired and too overwhelmed. If and when you do get a breather, you probably hit the couch for a Netflix fix or get lost scrolling social media. These are great options to tune out but they are far from cup-filling or stress-reducing. Fill that cup and feel better Filling your own cup first means making yourself more of a priority. A priority over others at times and that may not sit too well with you. If that’s the case, keep in mind that your self-care means not only will you feel better but you’ll be able to take even better care of others. When your cup is full you can operate as your optimal self. I don’t know about you, but I’m a much nicer person when I’m fully functioning and feeling good. You know you’re going to keep taking care of things, so now you have a choice to make. You can do it from an energised, feel-good place or you can do it from a place of resentment and bitterness, which is how we start to feel when we get worn out and still have so much to do. If you’ve decided to give filling your own cup a try, here are 5 suggestions that I’ve personally chosen for you if you’re feeling depleted and don’t know where to begin.  5 minutes of focused gratitude will change your life Start a gratitude journal in which you document each day at least 5 things that you are grateful for in your life. It need only take 5 minutes of your time. You can be grateful for people, things, experiences, places, or circumstances and once you get journaling, you won’t be short of ideas. Dedicating time each day to feel grateful will rapidly shift your vibe in the moment as well as your perspective of your life. It’s a real game-changer when it comes to filling up your cup and feeling good. To go deeper in your gratitude write a sentence about ‘why’ that person, place or thing makes you feel so damn grateful. Get moving on your goals Setting a new goal for yourself will get you excited about something and help you focus on what is good for you. If you’re feeling run down I recommend setting a health goal, so you are simultaneously doing good for your mind, body and energy levels. Start with something small and just a little bit of a stretch if you need to. Perhaps a 15-minute walk around the neighbourhood each day, or a morning yoga session. Make it a daily habit. If you’ve got something bigger in mind, go for it. The criteria are that it’s something you enjoy and that makes you feel great afterwards. Don’t forget your health goals can include exercise, food/nutrition, relaxation, sleep etc. Getaway with yourself for yourself A change of scenery can do wonders to break that feeling of monotony and the real gift comes when you go somewhere or do something by yourself, for yourself. Without a companion, you don’t have to take anyone else into consideration and are free to do as your heart desires. Book an overnight stay in a gorgeous hotel or a beach shack or take yourself to your favourite restaurant for dinner. How about a picnic in the park with your book or journal? Change something you can see for immediate effect Fill your cup instantly with a new outfit or a haircut that says ‘I am a woman who takes excellent care of myself.’ Investing in yourself in this way gives you an immediate result, a feel-amazing experience and sends a message to the Universe that you are worth it. A budget-friendly way to do this is to declutter your space. Get rid of everything you don’t need or want, or that makes you feel stressed or unhappy when you see it. Your bedroom, office and wardrobe are the best places to begin. You’ll feel so much better when it’s done and if you’re pushed for time, commit to just 10 minutes per day to work on it. A daily dose of me-time is not a luxury No matter how busy you are there are at least 10 minutes in your day that you can find to nurture yourself. Longer is better but start where you can. Gift yourself some me-time each and every day. Do whatever makes you feel good during and after that time. Read your book, take a bath, go for a walk, journal or stand on your head if that’s what does it for you. Tony Robbins says “if you don’t have 10 minutes for yourself, you don’t have a life.” You can do this! Me-time is not for scrolling social media, putting on the washing or calling your mum. Make it about you and be consistent with it every day. Now that you’ve got some ideas take 3 minutes to write a plan. What will you do and when will you do it? Decide now to give yourself the opportunity to fill your own cup and become a better functioning human being - for everyone’s sake. If you want more ideas download my free PD - Ignite Your Joy – The Ultimate Bucket List to Challenge Yourself for 32 ideas on ways to find that spark again. Simple, easy and even free suggestions to get you back on the journey to your inspired life.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations Do you sometimes (or often) hear that inner voice that has so much to say about why you shouldn’t go after your dream or try something new? It’s always talking you down or coming up with ‘reasons’ why you can’t. When fear or doubt come into play as a result of taking a risk or uncertainty, there’s always that inner voice. Its name is the inner critic and it’s trying to tell you something but not necessarily the truth. That inner voice is merely a part of you that wants to keep you safe and out of harm’s way. The message is, ‘this doesn’t feel safe and therefore it’s not good.’ This part of you is focused only on safety and doesn’t see the benefits of what you are about to do. So it will scream loudly in protest. So how to do we overcome this resistance and keep taking action? Think for yourself You can choose what thoughts and feelings you decide to buy into. To believe the inner critic or not. If I tell you that your hair is green when it’s clearly not, you will simply shrug off my comment and possibly think I’m a bit looney. If I keep insisting your hair is green, you may laugh at my insanity or feel sorry for my lack of knowledge. Know your truth and keep focused on the outcomes you want to achieve. Most of the time the inner critic is misinformed. It’s telling you something’s not safe when really there is little or no danger. Don’t blindly believe it. Think for yourself and look for evidence to support otherwise.  Acknowledge your inner critic Have ever tried to ignore your inner critic? When you try to ignore the voice it usually gets louder. Or if you do succeed in shutting it up, you can bet it’ll be back again soon. I teach this in-depth in some of my programs but here’s the quick tip that I want to share with you today about your inner critic. You must realise that your inner critic is like a small child that won’t be reasoned with – think 3 or 4 years old. It doesn’t care for logic, just wants its needs met. And what are those needs? Simple, to be heard, to be acknowledged. If you ignore it, it just screams louder than before. I like to acknowledge and make space for my inner critic, meeting her with a non-emotional curiosity until she gets bored of harassing me or says something so ridiculous that I simply can’t believe her. Remember, just because your inner critic has got things to say, doesn’t mean it’s true and it’s still up to you to decide whether you’re going to believe it or not. Don’t fight with your inner critic When you stop trying to suppress and ignore that inner voice and just allow it to speak, you immediately stop the struggle, stop the fight. The benefit of this is that you don’t get all emotional and stressed. It doesn’t mean you accept what it saying to be true, you just acknowledge its existence in a non-emotional way and from that place, you can decide to believe it or not. When simply allowed, that voice will soon run out of things to say and will become quiet of its own accord, or will say something so ridiculous that it loses all credibility. The key here is to not be tricked into the drama. Be the calm, cool, non-emotional, stable parent to your inner critic having a 3-year-old tantrum and it will soon subside. With a little practice in responding this way, it’s over in a minute and you can get on with your day. So the next time your inner critic tells you, ‘you won’t be good at it, you’re not good enough, you don’t even know what you’re doing, or you’re too old, too fat or your hair isn’t quite right to be successful’, learn to allow it with a non-emotional curiosity and it will soon pass. It’s not about what that fearful voice says, it’s about how you respond to it. Then decide for yourself what action you are going to take toward your big dreams and goals.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations If I were less emotional I’d probably get a lot more done. But I’m not a robot, I’m a fully functioning human being, the real deal, messy as it can be at times. There is often a super high expectation placed upon the entrepreneur to be this high-performance machine, avoiding the lows at all costs and being productive all the damn time. How unrealistic are we? Perhaps you even hold yourself to that expectation (you wouldn’t be the first).  Your emotions are never wrong! [ “What? But Melissa you are always saying I need to stay high vibe, feeling good.” ] Ok, let me explain. Your emotions always have a message for you and the more you look and listen, the easier it’ll be to work through the low times. Heck, nobody wants to stay in that feel-crap place right? I get it, you do want to be productive and moving toward your dream. Running in circles or having your feet stuck in cement just ruins your shoes. But you never want to make your emotions wrong. That is a surefire way to cut off your connection to your own truth and honest communication with yourself and others. Nobody wins with this approach. Instead of feeling ‘wrong’ when you’re not feeling good, many of the world’s best coaches suggest that you get curious instead. Learn to be ok in whatever the feeling is and search for the message it’s delivering. This is far more useful and can actually help you solve the problem. Accepting your emotions and working with them rather than fighting them is going to feel so much easier and get you back to a powerful, beautiful, productive state sooner. You will bypass the suffering and get better at managing your emotions. Which is good for your sanity and your business. It’s helpful to remember that whatever uncomfortable emotion you are experiencing, you’ve probably been there before. Instead of crumbling every time things go wrong, you can remind yourself that you will get through it. You have evidence in your past, that the sun will shine again.  So you’ve got this! You’ve been through it before and you can handle it today and if it happens again in the future, you’ve got that too. Which if you really think about it, is kind of exciting. Permission granted to feel any and all emotions, and tune in to what’s going on rather than suppressing it, and the confidence that whatever may come, you can handle it. Now you are mastering your emotions and building resilience and not wasting so much time and energy pretending everything is hunky-dory (for my overseas readers, that means alright) when it’s not. To sweeten the deal, the more you take charge of your emotional world, the more you‘ll begin to embrace the idea that you can, in fact, respond to events in your life, however you choose. But let’s dive into that next time. Want to learn more about emotional mastery? Connect with me in my community where we have great conversations about empowered life and business.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations Do you want to do more in your life and business but that pesky (or perhaps crippling) self-doubt keeps getting in your way? There’s a pretty high chance you’re nodding your head right now or letting out a sigh of agreeance. Well, friend, I feel your pain. But I know you were made for more, so let’s have a look at some no-nonsense ways that you can boost your self-belief today and get started on those amazing projects and dreams of yours. Remember who you are at your core Put aside, for a few moments, your doubts, fears and negativity, and answer this question: Who am I when I’m free of my limiting thoughts and behaviours? If this feels tricky for you, simply describe who you will be and how you will show up in the world, when you’ve got unshakeable self-belief. What kind of things will you do, what kind of thoughts will you think, how will you behave, dress, take care of yourself, what will you create and much abundance will you be welcoming into your life? Get loud and proud about it Create some great affirmations that speak directly to who you truly are, who you will be and the achievements you have in mind. It doesn’t matter if you don’t fully believe it yet, it’s time to declare your intention to the Universe and stop hiding behind your fears. Write it, speak it, get excited about it. I’d recommend going next level and turning your affirmations into incantations. Pump up your favourite high-vibe music, get into a powerful emotional state, and give your affirmation an energy that can not be denied.  Surround yourself with like-minded people You’ve most likely heard this before but it’s worth repeating. Spend less time (or no time) with people, in places, or contemplating information that makes you feel bad or doubt yourself. Get a new friend, business buddy or mastermind group where everyone is working on improving themselves. Find support and encouragement and give it to others. Read the books that inspire you and help you see what is all possible in this big world. Imagine how your self-belief will radically improve when you surround yourself with positivity daily. Manage your inner critic Got an overactive inner critic that never seems to shut up? There are ways to manage it and take charge, you don’t have to suffer. You could try the ‘ignore it’ approach, though personally, I’ve not had much success with this one. The reason being is that your inner critic is like a 4-year old. You ignore it and it just screams louder than before. I like to acknowledge and make space for my inner critic, meeting her with a non-emotional curiosity until she gets bored of harassing me or says something so ridiculous that I simply can’t believe her. (Stay tuned for next week’s blog if this is something you need to deal with). Either way, just because your inner critic has got things to say, doesn’t mean it’s true and it’s still up to you to decide whether you’re going to buy into it or not. Just don’t be tricked into her attempt to create drama. Be open to what you’re afraid of It’s much healthier to address your fears as you become aware of them and pave a clear path forward than suppress your fears and hope they decide to no get in the way. The same lessons will keep repeating in your life until you deal with what’s underlying your struggles. So just get on with working through your fears. You may need help to do this (if it’s really scary for you) and that’s perfectly ok. Find enough courage to take the first step and get the help you need. A coach, a counsellor, a therapist (lots of options here) or a mentor can help you work through your fears. This is how you will set yourself free from the doubt and begin believing that you have what it takes. Risk is not a dirty word You want to up your belief in yourself then you’ve got to challenge yourself daily. Take a chance on yourself and do something that you consider scary or risky. Start small and work your way up to bigger things. There’s no faster way to build your self-belief than to get out there and prove it to yourself. Don’t kid yourself about what growth is Building your self-belief requires you to grow and develop as a person. Unfortunately, there are no short-cuts and you are the only one who can do the work. Party pooper aren’t I? I’ve seen many people get excited about personal development when it’s the high-energy fun stuff, the positivity and the wins. The moment things get difficult or they experience a major setback, they run screaming for the hills. Get real about the journey because the sooner you can accept that it’s a bumpy road and that failure will be a part of it, the quicker you will reach your destination. PS When you get to your exciting new destination, you’ll celebrate and then set a course for the next level of growth and you’ll need a new level of self-beleif to match it. Rinse and repeat. You’ve got what it takes to make your dreams come true. But I can say it all day long, you are the one who has to believe it. So let’s get to it! Use the suggestions above and let me know how you go. Connect with me on socials and if you’re serious about going after your dreams and goals, building your confidence and upgrading your life, join me in my new free Facebook group ‘Out with the Ordinary’. We are all stepping up big time!  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations Feeling overwhelmed is such a common thing, especially if you are a solopreneur or small business owner, and definitely when you're starting out and the learning curve is steep. Here are three things, from my personal experience and working with many clients, that you absolutely must-do if you are going to get out of what can feel like a never-ending cycle of overwhelm and anxiety.
Getting clarity is always the place to begin Anytime you start to feel anxious or overwhelmed, you must do whatever you can to find clarity. I know how hard it can seem in the moment but there are simple processes you can follow to take the guesswork and confusion out of it. The main idea is that you’ve got to know what you want to achieve, and you've got to set some specific goals. Next, take stock of what's going on at the moment and ask yourself, “is this what I want, is it working, is it not working?” If what you want and what you’ve currently got isn’t the same, the next question is “what actions can I take to start closing the gap?” With clear goals and a defined gap, you can actually make a plan. Having clarity gives you a road map, like step by step instructions that you simply need to follow to start creating some momentum.  Organisation will save your sanity You know you need to take action on your plan to close the gap, right? It’s called implementation. Most people make a plan, get excited, take a few actions, and then give up or forget all about it. Why is this? I believe the primary reason for this is the lack of organization around the implementation of your plan. The thing is, you can't just do a little bit here and a little bit there, and expect it all to fall into place. Your plan, which breaks down into smaller steps, has to be logical, manageable, and actionable. So you need organization around your life or your business goal. Many people are afraid of structure and systems, thinking it will limit them somehow, but they are the same people who are struggling and stuck in overwhelm. Break your goal and plan down into tiny manageable steps and schedule them into your day, week, month. Learn to be effective with your time and set boundaries for both yourself and others around your goals. Change the core of your business, you. If you want to create something new in your life or business, you are going to have to do things differently. If what you're doing now was already working, you would already be done. You’ll need to grow as a person, get out of your comfort zone and be willing to transform yourself, so you can step up and do it differently. It requires you to let go of what is not working and put something new in its place. You are releasing and then rebuilding with something better, something more functional. The tricky part, where many come undone, is that transformation of self requires courage, persistence, and determination. Creating lasting change is something you may need help to achieve if those big changes require guidance and accountability. But transformation is a big part of stepping out and stepping up. You are amazing already but you’ve got to grow if you want to step out of anxiety and overwhelm. If you were already who you need to be, to have what you want, you'd already be doing it. In a nutshell, Step 1 - getting clarity empowers you and enables you to make a step-by-step plan. Step 2 - getting organized around your plan, allows you to actually follow through. Step 3 - getting transformed, being willing to do what it takes, will get you better results. When you act on these three steps, you will find more flow and alignment, you will create momentum and like magic, the overwhelm is gone. You can do this! If you need more guidance or help why not book in for a free chat and we’ll work out the best strategy for you.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations “I’m ready” she said, “This year I’m going to make it happen.” “Make what happen?” I asked. “Everything” she said, “more money, grow my business, get healthier, improve my relationship. This is my year!” “Ok then,” I said, “let’s get started.” “Yes, great,” she said. We looked at each other for a moment as the reality set in and she realised she had no idea how to begin. The excitement was quickly replaced by uncertainty and overwhelm, the enthusiasm with the dread of change. Whilst it doesn’t normally happen in a single moment (I’m exaggerating for effect), it definitely does happen that big aspirations can quickly become disheartening if you don’t clearly break them down. The changes you are looking to make in your life will be easier, the more specific you can be. Here are some of my favourite ways to take an exciting but vague idea such as ‘get fit or more money’ and turn them into action plans. Let’s face it, if she’d had an action plan, she’d know exactly where to begin.  #1 Ask good questions if you want good answers Whatever questions you are putting your brain to work on, it will find answers for you. Questions such as ‘Why don’t I have enough clients? Why am I so fat? Why does this always happen to me?’ are the kind of questions that will give you crappy answers. When it comes to your new and exciting ideas for your life, be sure to ask great questions. ‘How many ideal clients would I love to work with each month? What would be a happy, healthy, ideal weight for me? How can I best turn this around? What is the lesson for me in this experience?’ Asking good questions will give you more clarity and the ability to set specific goals or targets. Knowing that you want to make $100k in your business this year is very different to just wanting more money. It allows you to begin to make a plan. #2 Know what lights you up Start getting specific about your goals and check-in with each one to make sure it’s something that feels good. Goals that are out of alignment with who you want to be or how you want to live your life are incredibly difficult to follow through on. So the idea of ‘making more money’ becomes a specific income goal or a certain number of clients that will help you bring in that amount. If your top value is family time but your new goal will require 60 hours a week of your time, it’s not a good match. So know your values first. You might need a different goal or just a different strategy to achieve your goal. #3 Brainstorm the crap out of it Now comes the fun part. Sadly, many people skip this part and then wonder why they feel stuck on their goals, with no real idea on how to make them happen. Brainstorming your action steps is no more complex than grabbing a piece of paper and a pen and writing down any and all ideas that pop into your head. I love to use my big whiteboard for this and stay on my feet so my energy and creativity are flowing. Set aside a solid block of time, go nuts with ideas, nothing is too crazy. Afterward you will come back with a more realistic mind and choose the options that look, sound and feel the best. After a brainstorming session you will have no shortage of action steps to take. You can put them in order and get started. Will all of them pan out? Perhaps not, but any action is better than no action at all as it creates momentum, and momentum brings results and new ideas. You can speed up the brainstorming process by working with a coach or mentor who has already achieved what you want to achieve. They know the steps to take and will be able to guide you in a way that works for you. “Let’s break it down” I said, “what are you really aiming for here?” And so it begins. Get clarity and be specific about your goals. Make sure your goals are in alignment with your values. Brainstorm your ideas and come up with an action plan that allows you to get started today. Good luck on your big aspirations! An invitation to you: If you’re a woman in business pursuing big ideas this year, I invite you to join the Accelerator Experience and get into action. In this 10-week group program, I’ll help you to show up more, have a greater impact and make more money in your business, doing what you love. Jump in the next round starting mid February 2021. In an intimate group of like-minded women, you’ll find the guidance, support and accountability you need to stop feeling uncertain and overwhelmed, and make it happen. Join the Accelerator Experience today. Enrolments are open so secure your spot now or get in touch if you have further questions. Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love.  Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations |
Melissa Kay SchulzCoffee lover, mother, salsa dancer and mindset coach for entrepreneurs. 
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