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At this time of year, most of us are thinking about what we want to achieve in the next one. Perhaps you had some great wins in 2020, some not so great outcomes, and as it was generally a doozy of a year, you may have even had to change up some of your goals completely. Well here comes the clean slate of 2021. It’s an exciting time! If you’re dreaming of something more, something better, something amazing for your life. If you’ve got vision and big ideas, now is best the time to get it on paper, before the new year begins. When it comes to your wildest dreams, finding clarity and getting into action can feel daunting. After all, these are the big, life-changers and how do you even make a start on something so grand? Below are three of my favourite, easy (because we like easy) ways to go from dreaming to doing.  See yourself in the future and break it down This one’s for you if you want your goal-setting to be fun and easy. Based on Rachel Hollis’ 10:10:1 rule, turning your beautiful dream of a better future into actionable goals doesn’t get much easier than this. Here’s how it works:
The mega-list Another favourite is to brainstorm a mega-list of anything and everything you want to achieve in this lifetime. It goes like this:
Goals by life area If you’re more of a thorough, systematic individual, you may prefer this method to set goals in a balanced way in all areas of your life.
It really is that easy to come up with a list of goals for your life. If you’re feeling resistance to the idea of goal-setting, start small with your focus on only the next 12 months. Any of the above methods can be used for a shorter time period. Don’t forget the 3 most critical goal-setting rules. Plan from positivity. When you’re setting an intention or goal, be sure to do it from a high-vibe place of gratitude and an awesome attitude. You’re hardly going to set great goals if you’re feeling miserable or pessimistic, so get yourself in a high-energy, feel-good state before you sit down to plan out your life. Goals must be specific and measurable. Be clear about what you want to achieve and how you will know when you’ve achieved it. Setting a goal to lose weight or make more money is neither specific nor measurable. Saying you want to drop 10 kilos before New Year or make $145,000 in the current financial year, is both. This kind of clarity allows to you make a plan for reaching your goal. One thing at a time. Setting goals is easy but taking action can get overwhelming if you let it. So only work on one big goal at a time. Seriously, do not try and overhaul your entire life in one go. It’s a recipe for procrastination and giving up. For sure you can have a few small and ‘not too difficult’ goals on the go at the same time, like drink a green smoothie every morning and talk with 5 potential clients each week. But those big, audacious goals of yours, best to take them on one at a time so you can focus your energy and go all in. So what are you waiting for? Put it in your calendar when you’ll do a goal-setting session and get the clarity you need to start bringing those beautiful dreams to life. And if you want to get into action on your biz goals for 2021, so you can show up more, have a greater impact and make more money, I invite you to join me in the next Accelerator Experience beginning February 2021. In an intimate group of like-minded women, you’ll find the guidance, support and accountability you need to make it happen. Join the Accelerator Experience today. Limited early bird enrolments and prices are open until 21st December only. Secure your spot now.  Meet Melissa Kay
A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations
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It feels so good to know you are on track. When you are sure of where you’re headed, have set compelling goals and created a step by step plan to make them happen, you can’t help but feel excited. You have no trouble taking action and achieving top results. Sounds awesome right? Now let’s look at the more common reality. I talk to business owners and entrepreneurs every week and many of them feel uncertain about the direction of the business, overwhelmed or confused about what’s next. It’s like they’re going through the motions waiting to see what might happen. Or, if they’re just starting out, the excitement of their idea has faded as the reality of being in business kicked in. One thing they do know for sure, it’s neither exciting nor compelling. The good news is, it doesn’t have to be this like this (sounds cliche I know). But seriously, anyone is capable of creating or tapping into the vision they hold for the business and this is the number one place to start anytime you feel less than excited. When your vision is clear and compelling, everything else falls into place.Don’t sit around feeling stressed or miserable. Take one or more of the following actions and you’ll be back on track in no time.  Get your vision crystal clear If you’re feeling fuzzy, set aside an hour or a few, and go nuts, brainstorming all the ideas and details about what you want. Stay open during this process and let your creativity flow without rejecting any ideas, no matter crazy they might seem. Getting more practical and realistic happens later. First things first, dream a dream that’s big enough to excite you. Redefine your vision as needed As your business grows, things will change and you’ll learn and evolve alongside your business. Make sure you are checking in often and making adjustments as needed. How you thought it should be 12 months ago need no longer apply if it’s not working for you, or getting you out of bed in the mornings. It’s ok to let go of what’s not working so you stay inspired and excited. Set proper goals and stay focused In all areas of your business, well-defined goals equal clarity. Without them, you can’t make a plan of action and it’s difficult to follow-through and easy to give up. Hope is not a strategy and most importantly, when you’ve got clear goals and plans, the confusion and overwhelm goes away. If that doesn’t make being in business feel more exciting… then, I don’t know. By the way, do you know the number one cited reason for not having a clear and compelling vision? "I haven’t thought about it”. Ok then, get thinking and get excited because without it you’ll fall out of love with your business sooner or later. A little time invested in vision and planning now, will save you a lot of time and stress down the track. And if you need some help to set your compelling and aligned goals for 2021, check out the free goal-setting pop-up training I’m giving inside my Facebook community this week. It’s free and fun, and we’re all in it together, setting big, beautiful goals for an exciting year ahead.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations Ever have those moments when you need to overcome the fear and procrastination and just get on with it? When I started working for myself I was afraid of so many things… promoting myself on social media, making phone calls, asking for money, meeting new people at networking events, and oh, video. I was terrified, in particular, of Facebook lives, and would have all sorts of seemingly valid excuses why I couldn’t do them. Then I worked with a real kickass coach (not for the fainthearted) who insisted that I do 30 Facebook lives in 30 days. Ignoring the feeling of dread in my stomach I agreed to the challenge. It was one of those moments when you say yes and then immediately wonder if you’ve lost your marbles. But he was absolutely right in that after you do 30 in 30, you’ll feel very differently about it. The truth is, years later, I still don’t love it, but I’ve learned how to manage my thoughts and emotions around it and just do it. I developed a series of steps that can be quickly done prior to any uncomfortable situation, to feel more confident and relaxed. Many of my clients use this 5-step formula to ease the nerves, interrupt their pattern and shift themselves into action.  Step 1 Take charge of how you feel Put yourself in a more resourceful emotional state by managing your thoughts and feelings. Force yourself to think about things that make you feel good or even easier, move your body to get your energy flowing again. Use your body in a powerful and confident way and soon enough, you’ll begin to feel it. Stand tall, put a smile on your face, lift your chest and notice the difference. In others words, physically snap out of it. Step 2 Think about what you’re grateful for This has to be, hands down, one of the easiest ways to feel better fast. Whilst alone, it may not help you feel prepared to speak on a stage or make that sales call, but as an important part of the 5-step formula, it serves to shift your vibe quickly. Step 3 Keep your eye on the prize Stay focused on the outcome you want to achieve, and do not entertain the thoughts of everything that might go wrong. See and feel yourself getting the result exactly as you want it to be. When you visualize yourself succeeding you are essentially practicing a successful outcome. Remember, when you practice something enough, you get good at it. Step 4 Focus on what actually matters What's the deeper purpose or reason you are doing this? Who are you serving and what kind of an impact do you want to have? We become overly nervous, afraid or stuck in procrastination when we are focusing on ourselves. What if I mess up, what if someone doesn’t like it, how’s my hair? Take the focus off yourself and put it where it matters most, what you are really there to do. Step 5 Tap into courage and go Think of a time you’ve done something amazing or found your courage, and with that in mind, count 5,4,3,2,1 and go! Who have you helped before, what achievement are you most proud of in your life, when did you feel afraid but stepped up anyway? Make a choice to go for it and don’t let yourself back out. The 5-step formula, with a little practice, can happen in under 2 minutes and can be used anytime you need to find more confidence and move into action. Here’s my old routine for Facebook lives:
This is an easy example but the formula can be applied to any moment of fear or indecision. Now I said this is my old Facebook live prep routine because I don’t need to do it anymore. That’s the great news, once you've done something a few times, the fears lessen. But we all start somewhere, so try it out the next time you find yourself procrastinating doing that thing you know you need to do. Perhaps your fears aren’t around making videos, they might kick in when it comes to making the offer, closing the deal, asking people for money (often a big one), building new business relationships, or revealing yourself on social media. Test out the 5-steps and let me know what happens. When you can take charge over the fear and move yourself into action, you’ll become unstoppable. That’s when you will show up consistently, serve fully, and make money in your business. And if you are thinking it’s time to show up more in your business, so you can have a greater impact and make more money, I invite you to join me in the next Accelerator Experience in January 2021. In an intimate group of like-minded women, you’ll find the guidance, support and accountability you need to make it happen. Join the waitlist today for details, find out how you can access early bird prices, and be among the first to secure a spot when doors open in early December.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations If you’ve got big dreams and goals for your life and business, chances are you’ve already come across a naysayer or two. Someone in your family thinks you should ‘just be a little more realistic’. Perhaps your partner doesn’t understand why you are pouring your heart and soul into something that isn’t paying big bucks (yet). Your friends might want you to be like you were ‘in the good old days’ and the people around you seem more interested in living for the weekends instead of living every day. It’s tricky enough at times to manage your own doubts and stay focused, let lone dealing with naysayers. Sometimes our dreams and goals are too big for the people around us. It can be lonely, frustrating, and worse, it can make you begin to doubt yourself more. There are ways to handle it that will make your life much easier, and no, you don’t have to disown everybody in your family or move to another state. It’s true that you might need some new friends, inspiration and role models, which are easier to find than you might think.  Top 5 tips to deal with the naysayers: #1 My business is none of your business When someone asks you how your business is going, and it makes you feel uncomfortable, change the topic. This one applies to family members, friends and people at networking events who are fishing for ways to make you feel you’re on the wrong path or to elevate themselves. Don’t give anyone who’s not genuinely interested in supporting your success, the opportunity to kill your dreams. Your business is none if their business. “I’m loving it, thank you. How is Aunty Trisha doing these days?” #2 Choose wisely who you confide in It’s fantastic when you have someone you trust to share your big, audacious business goals with. That someone is not anyone. Before you start excitedly blurting out your latest and greatest vision, ask yourself these questions. Does this person also have big dreams and goals? Do they know anything about owning a business? Do they sincerely care for me and want to see me shine like a star? This one also applies to partners if they are not fully on board. Unfortunately, I’ve heard it from too many clients, women in particular, that their husband wasn’t supporting them to fulfil their dreams, and didn’t understand why they put so much time and energy into it. Be discerning about who you share your ideas and goals with. Not everyone will be as excited as you are, especially those who love you as you are and don’t want you to change. # 3 Don’t take advice from anyone who isn’t expert on the topic or hasn’t already achieved what you want. Duh! It’s crazy how we let others influence us! Have you ever been upset by a stranger’s comment on Instagram or doubted yourself because Uncle Tom suggested that online business isn’t a real business? Those strangers on Facebook who write long messages offering unsolicited advice and others who criticize your efforts, telling you to do it differently, without knowing anything about you or your business. Ignore them. Don’t rely on the well-meaning counsel offered in Forums and Facebook groups unless you know the person giving it is credible. They are great places for connection and ideas but don’t base your business decisions on guidance from random people. Don’t turn to your best friend who works a weekday 9-5 job for advice on what to do next or understand the plight of a budding entrepreneur. And as for Uncle Tom who had his own car repair business 30 years ago and wants to offload his outdated expertise onto someone, and relive his glory days, smile graciously and refer to tip #1. #4 Surround yourself with positivity and inspiration Get a regular dose of inspiration, useful and relevant information, and skills by attending seminars and workshops. Read books from the leaders your field, and tune in to podcasts and interviews. There is so much available for you, there’s no need to feel like you’re alone with your big dreams and goals. Check-in with those who’ve gone before you on the path to entrepreneurial success. Best make it a daily habit of at least 30 minutes of positive input and attend a great event a couple of times a year. Choose one that fires you up and creates massive momentum in the direction you want to go. #5 Don’t be average by default Have you heard that you become the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with? Sometimes our dreams and goals are too big for our current circle of five. That’s ok, you don’t have to abandon your friends and family who aren’t on a similar path to you. You can expand into a new circle by joining online or offline networking groups, communities, masterminds and programs. These spaces are filled with others who are also dreaming big and committed to taking a chance on themselves. This circle is where you share your audacious goals, find support and accountability, and openly share your wins without fear of being shot down by tall poppy syndrome.* You don’t owe anybody anything, most certainly not the naysayers, and you are free to create a life and business you truly love. There’s no need to play small and safe when you have every opportunity to be extraordinary. Whilst we are wired as human beings to look for validation from others in our groups, consider carefully whose opinions you give any weight to. If you’re ready to go after your big dreams and goals, and not willing to let anything or anyone stand in your way, I invite you to join me in the next Accelerator Experience in January 2021. In an intimate group of like-minded women, you’ll find the guidance, support and accountability you need to get there faster. Join the waitlist today for details, find out how you can access early bird prices, and be among the first to secure a spot when doors open.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations *The tall poppy syndrome describes the cultural phenomenon of mocking people who think highly of themselves, "cutting down the tall poppy". Common in Australia and New Zealand, it is seen by many as self-deprecating and by others as promoting modesty and egalitarianism. - source: Wikipedia. How to avoid wasting your time and money OK, so the likelihood of death is minimal, but the chances of wasting your time and money may be higher than you think. Hiring a coach will change your life and/or business! Check this top 7 list to make sure your life will be changing for the better and not just leaving you disappointed and out of pocket. If you’re considering working with a coach as we approach the new year (or anytime really), here are some of the common mistakes to avoid when finding the right one.  #1 Choosing the wrong type of coach There is a 'right' type of coach for everyone but there are many different kinds to choose from. Mindset coaches, business coaches, manifestation coaches, holistic coaches, kick-butt, high energy coaches, stress release coaches, career coaches, female-only coaches, healer coaches, health coaches, coaches for specific skills and the list goes on. What do you actually need? Coaching with compassion and insight, I intuitively get to the depth of things and will challenge you to be your best and hold you accountable. My goal is to get you what you want, on your terms, in a way that works for you. Most of my clients work with me on mindset, empowerment, confidence, clarity and planning, manifestation, emotional mastery and taking life and/or business to the next level. #2 Choosing the cheapest in town All coaching is an investment in you. You must be prepared to invest mentally, emotionally, financially and give it adequate time and energy. Be wary of coaches that do not charge sufficiently for their services. This can be an indication that they either lack experience, confidence to get results or don’t properly value their services. If you are serious about getting the best results from your coaching, do not base your choice on price alone. #3 Choosing someone 'just like you' Choosing a coach who is at the same place in life as you are, who thinks and acts similarly might be comfortable and easy, but it won't get you results. They won't be able to challenge you to grow as they haven't achieved it for themselves. If you want to create something more for yourself, look for a coach who has the kind of life or business you want, who's done what you need to do. Don't choose a coach based on them being a lovely person, you're not paying for a new friend. #4 Choosing the wrong amount of support Be willing to commit to your success. Rome wasn't built in a day and all that! Whilst occasionally a simple tweak in the right direction is all that is needed, most clients require a few months of coaching for sustainable and lasting results, and enough time for them to fully implement. This is simply the nature of being human, we need time to install new habits and reinforce new patterns. You can have a breakthrough in five minutes but the follow-through is another story. Say a big, fat yes to your goals and commit to a longer-term coaching package for full support and accountability. #5 Choosing the wrong style of coaching Do you prefer structure or a more individual approach? There are many coaches who genuinely want to help but lack the life experience, empathy or intuition to adapt to each client's unique needs. They follow a set structure to the tee, as provided by the institution they trained with. This can work well for some, but for many, it lacks the personal touch and slows down the transformation process. With my clients I use proven tools and processes, choosing the most appropriate and best ones for my client's situation. Sessions are totally customised to suit individual needs, goals and personalities. I like a fluid approach within a proven system, always with an intention to get you to your desired goal on the fastest track possible for you. #6 Ignoring Intuition A great connection with your coach is essential. You have to like and trust your coach for the journey to be enjoyable and to get great results. If you feel it’s a personality mismatch or you don’t feel at ease with them, try another coach. The coach may also say that they don’t see the relationship being a good fit, and may recommend another coach. It's important that you feel optimistic and excited to be working with your coach. #7 Failing to check them out Ok, a little stalking 101 goes a long way. It's important to check out your potential coach. Visit their website, suss out their social media, watch their videos, find out what they're about, what kind of life do they live, what kind of business do they have, what do others say about them? Read their testimonials and get on the phone to have a conversation with them, asking any questions before you sign up. Oh and here's a super important bonus #8 that definitely deserves a mention - Does the coach have a coach? The answer should be a resounding yes! Make sure the coach you choose walks their talk, engages their own coach, fully believes in their own profession and knows first-hand the benefits of coaching. Has this helped you consider your options for coaching? Did I miss something? Let me know so I can add it to the list. If you’re considering coaching in the near future, let’s have a chat. You can book a free 20-minute call with me and I’m happy to answer any questions you may have.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations What’s your biggest enemy in business? Is it the dreaded overwhelm? Perhaps it’s procrastination, imposter syndrome, self-doubt or a lack of confidence? You might experience one or several of these. I know I’ve been through them all many times and need to keep them at bay ongoing. In business, feeling on top of things and knowing things are working out, kind of comes and goes. Let’s face it, building a business has more than a few challenges. Many of the success stories you see and read about have been the result of years of building to that point, though they don’t always show you the struggles. So there’s emotional ups and downs that are inevitable. Your job is to learn how to manage those ups and down for yourself, so you don’t stay down for too long. If you get stuck on the emotional roller coaster it will make you inconsistent, unreliable and unproductive in your business. I work with most of my clients on this and I want to share it with you today. The number one thing that will change your life and business forever is learning to manage your emotional state. When you feel good, you will naturally take more action.  Here are 2 easy ways to come back to feeling good anywhere, anytime. #1 Add an F Yes you can use the F to swear if you want, but once you’re done with that, try this: Feeling SHIT… add an F = SHIFT your FOCUS Just think about something else! Catch your unhelpful thoughts and shift into thinking about something better. Think about something that excites you or inspires you. If you can’t get a grip on your thoughts and keep looping in negativity, read a book, blog or listen to a podcast from someone you admire. Try some comedy to break the pattern or call up a friend and talk about what’s going on for them. If you get stuck, go to gratitude. Thinking about something or someone you are grateful for instantly changes your emotional state. It’s the easiest and most powerful way to get positivity back into your day and perspective on your situation. Right now, what’s one thing you are so incredibly grateful for in your life? #2 Move your Body This has to be the simplest way to change how you feel at any moment. Try it now: stand up, lift your chest, look up and put a big smile on your face (even if you have to force it). You can’t stay miserable for long when you stand like this. Be careful, you might start to feel confident too. Get your energy flowing by going for a walk, dancing in your office, working out or simply strike a power pose (think superhero). Whatever you like to do, make it fun and easy for yourself. Go a step further and incorporate these movements into your day, every day. Why wait until you feel like poop? Give yourself the best chance to maintain feeling good with regular physical activities to boost your energy and mood. You’ve already got the tools inside of you to manage your emotions, you simply need to start using them. Practice them by becoming more and more aware when you begin to slide into negativity or unresourceful emotional states. Practice catching those moments and making a different choice by using one of the two methods above. If you’re resisting this idea because it’s too simple and your situation is too complicated, I urge you to try it out just a few times. You’ve got nothing to lose except your bad mood :)  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations Are you ready for a reset and a new beginning? A new project, relationship, or perhaps even a complete life overhaul. 2020 has been an eye-opener, causing me to step back and prioritize, get clearer on my values, and what's worth my time and energy. But it was in late 2019, after burning out in life and business, that I decided it was time for some serious change. I considered what it really takes to move forward and stick to a new path. Too often people start off well, but give up partway or fall back into old habits after a couple of months. There are 3 phases of creating a new chapter and I found when I spent adequate time in each, I followed through. I began using this 3-phase system with my clients and they followed through. It’s when we try and skip a phase that things don’t hold together. If you want to start something new and create lasting change, here are 3 phases that you must include:  1. Clarity is key to begin This is simply an honest look at where you're at, what needs to change, and a commitment to do so. Surprisingly so many people don’t have clarity on their situation. They know they’re not happy with the way things are but they don’t take the time to get clear on what they truly want. They just go for different! Well, different can mean a lot of things and if you’re not specific in what you want, your new destination can be just as dissatisfying as the old one. You’ve got to take an honest look at your starting point and your desired destination, so you can figure out how to get from here to there. How will you know what exactly needs to change if you’re not willing to be real about where you’re at now? Take time to get clarity. It’s not rocket science, it just takes times and asking the right questions. Clarity is key and when you couple that with a decision to go for it, a commitment to a new path, that’s when you create momentum in the right direction. 2. Don’t expect change if you don’t change You’ve got to transform yourself to meet your new, exciting destination. We are all capable of change but sometimes it’s easier to hold on to what you know and feel comfortable with. You want things to be different but you resist the change. Letting go of what stops you from changing, clearing out those old beliefs around who you are and what you think you’re capable of, is where the lasting transformation becomes possible. You don’t need to force the new, you need to let go of the old. Spend some time in this second phase, letting go of what holds you back so can truly create something new. 3. It only happens when you follow through Phase three means implementation. This is the part where you get organized around your new plans, take charge of yourself on a daily basis, and maintain awareness of your journey. Have you had great plans before and not followed through on them? You probably didn’t have a clear plan that enabled you to know what to do and stick to it. Big goals and dreams need a plan with bite-size steps so you don’t feel overwhelmed and lost. Showing up to your new commitment every day is so much easier when you feel clear and confident about it. And on those days when it does feel scary, you need to tap into your courage and resilience to keep going. This won’t be a problem if you paid enough attention to phase two. When you try and skip a phase you don’t give yourself a fighting chance to succeed. It looks like:
What phase are you best at and which one has definite room for improvement? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this and what you’re working on.  Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations Have you got a big ‘something’ that you’d really love to do but fear is stopping you from taking action on it? Is it time to finally start on that new business idea, get into public speaking, go on the adventure of a lifetime, or join that club with the cool social activities? Most of us have something. The fear that keeps you stuck often shows up in the form of excuses that are easy to buy into, such as, I don’t have enough time for that, I can’t afford it, or I don’t have what it takes. And don’t forget the favourite procrastination lie, “I’ll definitely do it one day, but now is not the right time.” Whatever excuses you come up with, they are all ways to keep you safe and comfortable, so you don’t have to take a chance on yourself. But here’s the thing, by not tapping into your courage and going for it, you are missing out on so much joy, fulfilment and personal growth. You might also miss out on a whole lot of fun, beautiful relationships, potential income, new skills and the magnificent ripple effect to all things that happens when you show up courageously in your own life. As an empowerment coach, my job is to help you shine. So here are three powerful ways to help you find your courage and take that big leap, no matter what you are jumping in to.  #1 What’s the worst that could happen? Ask yourself that exact question. If you say yes to yourself and leap big, what’s the worst thing that could happen? You might fail miserably, feel embarrassed, lose some money or be rejected by someone? Sounds horrible right? The unfortunate truth here is that anyone who has ever taken a risk on something uncertain has probably experienced one or all of these things at some point. The good news is that they also had great wins because they took a chance, they recovered from any setbacks and went on to do great things in life. The real fear comes when we believe that we won’t be able to handle the outcome, whatever it might be. People who feel confident to take risks, simply know that whatever happens, they’ll be able to handle it, even if it’s not pleasant, and they’ll move on. And I’d put money on the fact that you can think of an experience in your life when you thought you’d never recover, but one day you found yourself smiling and enjoying life again. First broken heart ring a bell anyone? You are far more resilient than you give yourself credit for, so you must know that whatever happens, you will be ok. But here’s an equally important question to ask and answer. What’s the worst thing that could happen if you say no and continue to live your life unchanged? Will you be kicking yourself and regretting it for the rest of your life? Will you remain unfulfilled and sad that your true desires continue to be ignored? Who will you become and how will you live if you don’t follow your dream? Take time to answer the question and write it down. This may be just the leverage you need to leap big. I’m nowhere near my deathbed as I write this but I’m certain those regrets are going to be a real bitch when I get there. Whatever you want to do in this life, do it now while you have the chance. #2 Get proactive about finding your courage Don’t wait for the moments you really need the courage and then wonder where it is. You can start small and do little things each day to expand your comfort zone. Go try that new activity with a friend, video yourself speaking on do a Facebook live, talk with a colleague, coach or understanding friend about your new business idea. Take little risks often to get comfortable being in the uncomfortable. You’ll quickly realise that you won’t collapse in heap and you’ll grow your courage muscles so they are strong when you need them for bigger things. #3 Name and embrace your fear, then say goodbye to it Fears that aren’t defined are deadly to your dreams and goals. Get super clear on what is actually going on for you by looking at and describing your fears in detail. Write it out. Give it a name. Often just by looking at it, instead of suppressing, shying away from or covering it with excuses, it becomes less scary. This happens because the fear becomes clear instead of a big, dark monster in the shadows that you don’t understand and can’t predict. When you face your fear, you empower yourself to do something about it, and the solutions often quickly follow. So my suggestion is that you look at it, name it, feel it and then decide you are going to take action despite it, because you realise you can handle whatever comes your way. Make that conscious choice to let it go, knowing that it doesn’t serve you. Use the three powerful methods to transform your relationship with your fears and allow yourself to act upon those beautiful dreams you keep within. When you shine brightly, you make the world a better place for the rest of us. When you invest in your own joy and fulfilment, the return on investment ripples throughout all areas of your life. It simply takes a little courage. I’d love to know what leap you are ready to take. Please let me know in the comments or write to me at melissa@melissakaycoaching.com.au  Meet Melissa Kay
A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations You create happiness in life, it’s not something that happens by default. Happiness isn’t just an emotional thing either. Research shows that happiness has a profound impact on your health, mental and physical well-being. So it’s time to get your happy on with these top 7 habits for happiness.  #1 Know What You Want Research shows that people who are clear on what they want, feel better in their life, and have more sense of purpose and direction. This makes sense because clarity helps you feel more peaceful, more at ease and more confident in what you need to do. Knowing what you want has been demonstrated time and time again as a key ingredient of success. Sometimes knowing what you want can feel difficult, but mostly it's because you haven't taken the time to ask the right questions and work it out for yourself. When you know what you want you’ll get much better results in life, which is going to boost your sense of achievement, making you feel happier. #2 Laugh Find ways to have a good laugh, to relax a bit and not take life too seriously. Even just for a few minutes a day, when you can let go of your stress and busyness, find something funny, amusing or evening just smile at the absurdity of it all. Laughter has been researched extensively and proven to have not only major emotional and psychological benefits but physical ones as well. #3 Do Something that Scares You What is something that you're actually afraid of, that you've been putting off, avoiding, or plain out refusing to do? It's time that you face up to your fears and make progress by actually tackling it, or at the very least looking at it. This is known as stretching your comfort zone. Each time that you move out of your comfort zone, even if it's terrifying at the moment, it feels amazing afterwards. You’ll feel accomplished, proud, and more capable than you did before. Tackling new challenges on a regular basis, doing something that you're afraid of each day, well lead you to a happier and more fulfilling life. #4 Move It We all know the physical benefits of physical activity but exercise is not just for your body. There is a strong correlation between your emotional and mental well-being and physical exercise. Regular daily activity is an absolute essential for a happy life. The bottom line is, it makes you feel good. You don’t need to become a gym junkie unless you want to, but you must move every day. The key is to make your exercise fun so you actually want to do it. Go for a walk, crank up the music and jump around the house, take a yoga or dance class. If running, biking, aerobics or sweat sessions at the gym are your thing, do that too.  # 5 Give and Receive This could be two separate habits, but I've put them as one because I want you to pay attention to keeping these in balance. Too many women are great at giving and forget about the receiving part. Giving could look like contributions, helping others out, volunteering, taking care of family, donating money, time or energy. Giving brings a huge emotional feel-good factor to your life, contributing to your happiness. Find ways that you can easily give to others. Important - It’s not meant to be a burden. True giving should not be an inconvenience or cause you stress, it’s meant to feel good. Find ways that you can receive. Receiving could look like asking for help, and allowing others to contribute to you. Be open to those who want to help you, know how worthy you are of receiving time, energy, gifts and money into your world. Many women don't like to ask for help but this is something I ask you to get over right now. You don't have to be responsible for everything and everyone and there are people in this world who want to help you. Stop blocking the flow of goodness to yourself and allow others the joy of giving to you. # 6 Gratitude Focus on what is working, focus on what is going well in your life. Practice gratitude daily. One of the easiest ways to do this is to write down every day a few things that you're grateful for and a few things that are working well. This simple activity will help you to slow down and notice all the good and abundance that is in your life, and the natural result is that you will feel happier. It will rapidly shift your perspective and perception. It's very easy to stay stuck and focused on the things that go wrong each day and totally miss the things that go right. # 7 Forgiveness Forgiveness is not about condoning something that has happened or letting someone off the hook who has done something unacceptable. Forgiveness is about letting yourself out of that dynamic. You can't overdose on forgiveness and I suggest that you forgive everyone and everything that has ever done anything wrong by you. Remember it’s not about the other person or situation, this is about freeing yourself so that you can get on with living a full life. Forgive quickly as things happen, let go, don't hold grudges, and feel how much lighter you become. There are simple practices that you can do to forgive and let go. Nothing, no matter how awful it might seem, is worth holding onto and feeling the pain of every day. You are only hurting yourself when you hold onto it. Give yourself the gift of forgiveness so that you can become who you are truly meant to be. What’s next for you? It’s time to show up more powerfully and joyfully in your life. You can grab the 7 Happiness Habits workbook for free (includes checklist and activities you can do today) and start creating more happiness in your life. You can book in for a free 20 minute chat with me to discover how you can stop procrastinating and doubting your big goals, take charge and bring your dreams to life.  Meet Melissa Kay
A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love. Ways to work with Melissa Join the Accelerator program - join the waitlist Work with Melissa VIP style - 1:1 coaching packages Join the free Facebook community - for daily content and great conversations Is a lack of confidence holding you back or stopping you from taking action on your dreams? I know it’s stopped me in my tracks plenty of times. But you know what? Confidence is nothing more than a feeling of certainty that you create within yourself. That’s right, YOU create it. Many people think that it’s a trait. It’s something you either have or don’t have. That idea is so misleading and leaves you feeling helpless. But the successful people of the world know better. They are not free from doubt or uncertainty, they simply know how to take charge of themselves and change those feelings into more resourceful ones. Being confident is nothing more than believing in yourself and trusting that you can handle the outcome of whatever happens. If there’s something you want in your life but you’ve been too afraid to go for it, here are a few simple ways you can boost your confidence right now. Don’t wait for someday when it might feel better, or go without because you believe you’re just not confident enough to take action. Up your confidence right now and get started.  #1 Understand and feel confident already with focus Remembering that confidence is something you create will shift your perspective and instantly put the power back in your hands. You CAN do something about it! Confidence is a feeling that you already know, and it lives inside of you when you think of areas of your life in which you excel. What are you great at? Where do you show up as your best? What do you feel completely competent and confident about? Answer these questions and tap into the feeling you get when you focus on those things. There you go, you just created the feeling of confidence inside yourself. #2 Create confidence by using your body Describe a confident person. How do they walk, talk, breathe, speak? If you can describe them it’s because you already know how you need to move your body if you want to feel confident. When you are in an unresourceful or negative state, you will likely hunch over, drop your eyes, and forget to breathe properly. You can create different feelings in your body by changing how you move. If you want to feel confident, move like you would if you did. #3 Visualize the outcome you want Instead of asking “what if it doesn’t work out?” and thinking about everything that could go wrong, imagine the outcome you really want. Visualizing yourself doing that thing or achieving that goal is like a practice run for your success. See it and feel it working. And what happens when you practice something over and over? You get better at it. When you visualise with emotion, your mind can’t tell if it’s happening in real life or not and so you’ll grow your confidence before you even take on the challenge for real. Building confidence may take a little time and persistence but with the right focus and energy, you can be certain that you can achieve whatever you set your mind and heart to. That’s the kind of confidence that will have you taking consistent action toward your big dreams and goal. What are already confident about? I’d love to hear about it. Meet Melissa Kay A mother, lover of life, personal growth, and good coffee, Melissa has a passion for inspiring and helping others to dream big and take action. She owns and runs Melissa Kay Coaching where she focuses on empowerment and lasting transformation, so her clients can create a life and business they truly love.  |
Melissa Kay SchulzCoffee lover, mother, salsa dancer and mindset coach for entrepreneurs. 
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